My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I think my fart just growled at me.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
