More tranny stories later!
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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