When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize