I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
