We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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