Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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