i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
