I wanna bring you to show and tell
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Randomize