We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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