your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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