You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
pop tarts are not kleenex
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
