she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
