OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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