I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Even my vagina gasped.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize
