it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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