Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize