so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
