addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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