So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
