I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize