ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
