Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
