One girl and one boy is just not enough.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
