would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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