I think im going to throw up on grandma
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize