I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
