he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
