Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize