if i can run in heels then i can drive
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
