Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
