This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
