im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
