Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
