and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
