whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
