I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
