Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
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