then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize