maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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