Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
