no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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