his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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