You're completely useless in the revolution.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
