The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
