Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm both gender and math confused
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
