I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize