i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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