forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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