Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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