So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I have aggressive nipples.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize
