honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
